My family has been patronizing several local restaurants with weekly takeout orders to help them survive the pandemic. One of them regularly includes free desserts that we didn’t order and don’t want. How do we decline these generous gifts without hurting anyone’s feelings?  —Poppy

Use your words, Poppy! Why would a restaurateur resent a regular patron for declining free food? Say, “We really appreciate the free desserts you’ve been sending, but can you leave them out from now on?” You may need to repeat this request when you order. The free desserts may be a general marketing strategy of the grateful restaurant and not aimed at you specifically.

—Adapted from “Social Q’s” in The New York Times Magazine