When I’m with friends, they often want to make TikToks. I worry that other friends will see the clips and feel excluded. At times, TikToks have made me feel separate from my friends, and I don’t want to make anyone else feel that. How can I be polite and still respect other people’s feelings? —M

IF YOU REALLY DON’T enjoy making clips, say, “Let’s do something else. I need a breather from TikTok.” You may be surprised to find that others agree. Sometimes posting can feel like pressure. But if the only thing stopping you is your fear of hurting absent friends, why not include a few when you hang out? Or invite others to make TikToks with you later? We can’t all be invited to everything. And much of social life is an accident: being in the right place at the right time. Better to expand the pool of people who are in those places than reject fun opportunities when they arise.

—Adapted from “Social Q’s” in The New York Times Magazine